Thursday, June 5, 2014

Advice From a Caterpillar

 This chapter comes a little out of order according to Alice, but it needs to come here according to the SLA cannon.

Chapter 4: Advice from a Caterpillar
(Secret Love Affair - Alice in Wonderland Parody) 

Hye-won wandered away to where an @ash623 marked the beginning of the @greenwood96. A large @ktomato was growing there, about the same height as herself; and when she had looked around it to the right and around it to the left, it occurred to her to see what was on the top. She stepped back to get a better look and was surprised to see a large caterpillar playing a spinet piano.

It stopped playing to take a look at her. “Who are YOU?” it asked.

“A piano teacher,” she answered.

“Not a ballet teacher? I can't abide ballet.”

“It's the accompanists,” she sympathized. “They get lazy. Come play for me. I have a concert grand.”

“A grand.” He wiggled down off the @ktomato.

He liked the padded door to her piano room. “It's nice in here,” he said. “It's like a cocoon. I could stay in here all day.” They did. They played solos for each other and duets by @chingulinka, @kalidreamz, and @suchadiva42; and were only interrupted once, when the duchess came by.

“Set me up with HIM!” she exclaimed, side-stepping a bevy of little girls in pink tutus that ran through screaming when she opened the door.

“Out!” roared Hye-won.

“Not ballet!” shrieked the caterpillar.

They didn't even eat. The ahjumma brought a them a dish of celery and they didn't want it. “I thought a caterpillar would like celery,” she said.

At the end of the day, Hye-won pinched the caterpillar's cheek and said it was a special compliment. The next week she invited herself over to the @ktomato to watch him play the spinet. Climbing up on top, she stepped on something that burned her foot. “What is this?” she yelped.

“Glu- glu- glue trap!” the caterpillar sputtered.

“Why does this hurt so much?”

He grabbed some leaves and tried to pull it off. “It will hurt a lot. Endure it a little bit.”

“It'll hurt a lot but you want me to endure it only a little bit? Oh – ahh!” as he jerked harder and it came off. And then she yelped again as he picked her up in all his many arms and carried her down the @ktomato to wash her feet with soybean oil.